There are few moments in life filled with more potential than ones involving a good back pack, good company, and no particular plans. And it was in such a situation that I found myself at 4:00 a.m on Friday, March 4th, downtown Bangkok as I grabbed a cab and thew our packs in the back. We were on our way to a 6:00 am flight to Koh Samui in the Gulf of Thailand and I could feel the seeds of adventure sprouting for us. But I suppose the real adventure began a couple of days earlier.
As fate would have it, Mack and I both hurt our backs the week prior to our flight to Bangkok. He hurt himself on the bunny slopes at Chrystal Mountain (even though he'll tell you it was steep and deep) while I hurt mine playing volleyball (even thought we lost). While I had chose stretching and excercise to start the healing, Mack had fell back on his own "Deiselesque" therapy. I arrive at his house on Monday night after my weekly V-Ball game in the U-District to drop off one of two 2-way radios that we'd use to find each other in Bankok. I walk in the living room only to find it covered with random travel paraphenalia and gear. This is the Diesel method. Organized chaos squeezed into a back pack. He informs me that he's been taking some pain killers and wine to ease the pain. This, given his 2:00 am flight out and general state of affairs, scares me a bit. Plus, he seems extremely chatty and happy but not very competent. He couldn't even find a pen and I had to get one of out my car. But, he is a grown man after all so I give him the radio and some other details and head out in order to let him get back to packing.
I fly out the next day at 1:30, about 12 hours after the Deez (Mack) and look forward to reading some books that I had put off for a while during my C# studies. I end up sitting next to a Korean business man who claimed to have seen the devil and was now pursuing his degree in Theology. His plan was to join all the other Korean ministers spreading christianity in Communist China. What a swell plan! I did find the guy likeable and we did have some pleasant although strained conversation. At one point I had to escape to the back of the plane to read my book because he wanted to discuss the virtues of Christianity but every time I presented him with contradictions and falsities in the bible, he would change the topic. Eventually, I had to escape to the back of the plane and sit in the stewardess chair to read my book. After a 2 hour pit stop in Seoul (last post) I jump on the flight to Bangkok and finally take a fat chunk out of the book. I finish the last sentence as our wheels touch down. Seriously, it was pretty cool.
After a brief (90 minute) and pleasant stroll through customs where I daydreamed about root canals, I hop in a cab and tell him to take me to Khao San road. All I know was that the Deez would be there and he would have turned the radio I gave him on around midnight. My cab driver is very enthusiastic about making small talk. Minor problem ... he doesn't speak english. This, as it turns out, isn't really considered a problem in Thailand. The art, is in being able to "Pretend" that you understand. Even it if leads to you doing ridiculous things and wasting other peoples time. I don't remember it being this bad last time but maybe I was just younger with less venom in my veins.
Anyway, I begin to reflect in the cab and think about my ride from the airport last time I was here. That time, Seth's driver picked me up in his black mercedes and took me to his high-rise penthouse. This time I was headed to the seediest part of town to sleep in a $12 room with plastic sheets and no TP. And I couldn't be happier. Wouldn't trade it for Donald Trumps toupe' OR his polyurethane wife.
I hit the call button on the radio a few times but no response. Finally, as I'm pulling my bag out of the trunk the radio crakles.
"Ardi?"
"DEEEEEEEZ!"
"Are you here?"
"Yeah, where are you?"
"I'm at the crkh#$#$yert"
"What?"
"*&(FDDTTD*^*^"
"OK ... Any other landmarks?"
It goes on like this for a while. Finally (sadly) we choose Burger King as a landmark and meet up a few minutes later. His look tell's it all. He's got the big smile, the puffed out chest, and movie star grin goin'. I can tell he's already having a good time. I watch him expertly navigate through the transvestite prostitues as he takes me to our room. He's already a pro. Good for him.
We step out for a drink and a bite and go to bed early (kinda) after a brief stroll. I couldn't sleep since it was 10:00 am at home. I got a couple of hours of sleep and we were up to take care of all the loose ends before Matt came to town. First things first, how quick can we get outta Bangkok? We're in luck. The only flights to Koh Samui available for the next day are at 6:00 am. This means, weather we like it or not, we're leaving town EXTRA early. I wondered if I should just take my stuff with me when I go to pick up Matt at the airport and sleep for a few hours in the terminal. We decide to bring Matt back in case he wants to shower and eat. Also, this way he could see Bangkok (sorta).
The rest of the day is spent shopping, taking pictures, visiting parks, etc. A couple of funy things happened.
We were eating lunch at a small cafe and noticed our waitress acting very strange. It really didn't make any sense to us. Finally, towards the end, she asks me: "So, are you the man?" It dawned on me that she thought we were gay. We laughed it off and had a good time teasing her. But we were also curious why she would think that. We certainly didn't look the part. It turns out that we were apparently a little too involved in each others company and our lack of attention to external stuff like women, etc. was construed as gay. Fuck it, I'm glad I got a bro that's so funny he takes my mind and my eyes off women.
The other funny incident was when I accidentally gave Mack 15 baht (30 cents) for our 150 baht (4 dollar) cab ride. I was tying my shoe in the back when I heard the most violent guttural animal scream emanate from the driver. I guess that was his way of telling Mack the amount was wrong. I don't know why but that event and Mack's confused deer in the headlights look had me laughing for ever. I was walking down the street looking extra touristy with tears coming out of my eyes.
We come across an outdoor gym. I love working out in hot humid weather. If feels so good on the joints and muscles. The temperature at Bothell Golds sucks!!!!
I eat fried spiders, grass hoppers, maggots, worms, and pupae. The grass hoppers are too salty. The worms taste like dirt.
I sleep from 10:00 pm to 1:00 am and pick Matt up at the airport at 1:30. Well, closer to 2:00 since I got dropped off at the wrong terminal. I was worried that the news of the 6:00 am flight at the tail end of a 20 hour trip would bum him out but he's in great spirits. He showers, we eat, and then the moment mentioned at the intro above.
We play cards and laugh before we get on the plane. The flight is quick. I read the lonely planet book. Matt reads the diving book. We plan some dives and activities.
Chaweng Beach is on the Eastern side of Koh samui and reminds me of a 3rd world Las Vegas. Busy with lots of stores, lights, bling bling, boom boom. But at 7:00 am it's a ghost town. I find myself getting nostalgic as we pass areas of fun times last time I was here. We find a simple but big bungalow for the 3 of us and spend the rest of the day exploring the beach and streets. They get me drunk off 3 long islands. I take an afternoon nap. We go out. I start calling Mack #1 American GI due to his penchant for innocent flirtation with the prostitutes that are contantly harassing men from bars and street corners. I emphasize "Innocent". I don't want to defame him. He smiles and waves whereas I run away like a retareded school boy who just shit his pants and doesn't want anyone to know. Frankly, I like like his way better.
I get up early (8:00) the next day and visit various dive shops to plan some dives for me and the boys. I gradually realize that diving trips in Koh Samui are a waste of time and $. The reason is that they have to take you away (to Islands like Koh Tao) for dives. This increases their costs as well the travel time to and from the dive spots. 1 or 2 dives could consume your whole day. We decide that since we're going north anyway, we'll dive from there. We focus on hammering out the non-dive activities in Koh Samui and getting out of dodge asap.
While the boys were sleeping and I was learning more about the dive situation I also found some mopeds for rent. Our first destination, the infamous waterfalls. Infamous, due to the fact that Khasha a B-Sack climbed straight up the waterfall and took some pics. We were determined to out do them. I LOVE riding the bikes with no helmet and no shirt, flying though the country side roads and farms surrounded by sun, skye, palm trees, and blue waters. THIS IS South East ASIA! It is the best time I've had on this place.
The first thing we see when we get to the bottom of the waterfalls are the elephants. Rides are cheap so we jump on. They are sooooooo cool and sooooo powerful. I switch seats with the driver and he shows me how to steer and communicate with the elephant. They are very intelligent and can perform a wide variety of tasks on command.
After that we begin the climb. I stash everything behind some bushes except for a camera which I put in a ziplock back and put in the cargo pocket of my board shorts. I tighten my amphibious Solomon shoes. No socks, no weight. Both hands are free. We're off. Sweating, climbing, jumping, taking pictures, sweating, climing, sweating, climbing, slipping, scraping, pulling, sweating, climbing.
The pool at the top is great. We swim & cool off. We're just chatting away on the way down when we suddenly realize we're on a road? What? Shitsticks !!! (Matt's words). We cut back tough some farms and find the trail head. We spend more time playing with the elephants (the baby is allowed to roam free) the Macaques and Gibbons (monkeys). More great pics. We get barbequed chicken legs and pineapples from a street side vendor. We all agreed it was the best meal ever.
I was feeling so great about the activities of the day that I went right along with the plan of sharing a bucket of samsung whiskey with the fellas. Thai whiskey has amphetamines in it. I don't think I fell asleep 'til 6:00. Woke up feeling like shit and came up with my new vows. For the rest of this trip I will:
1) Not drink alcohol
2) Be in bed by 2:00 (3:00 is ok too)
3) Go running at least 2 out of 3 days.
I think leaving Koh Samui will help me out with this plan.
The last one was added when Matt and I tried peppering on the beach today and I was like a bowl of winded jello. Gotta get (stay) in shape for the full moon volleyball tournament in Koh Phangan.
Anyway, today was spent exploring the North and West side of the island. Loved it. But .... I think my spine has had enough pounding for 2 days. Tomorrow we'll hang out on the beach and arrange for our boat ride to Koh Tao. We're gonna try to catch a few days of diving before heading to Koh Phangan around the 10th.
Details will follow.
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