Ever notice how clothes have a way of getting demoted? Some people throw clothes away but I usually keep them around for sentimental or practical reasons. I was mowing the lawn the other day and I happened to glance down at the old, ripped up hiking boots I usually wear for yard work. I started to think about all the clothes that we wear during important or epic times in our lives and how years later, they become demoted to the basement like Milton in Office Space. Then it occurred to me that maybe it's not the clothes that get demoted. Maybe it's the owner’s life that evolves into a catatonic abyss and the clothes follow the owner's demise.
Here's my list of the top clothing downfalls of all time:
- The boots that braved the Amazon rainforest now mow the lawn.
- The fleece that climbed Machu Pichu now takes the kids on Sunday morning strolls.
- The shorts that partied on the beaches of Ibiza now go to the gym.
- The jeans that rolled at all-night raves now roll around in rat poo under crawl spaces and are not even allowed in the house
- The gloves that saved fingers in Fernies 20 below cold snap now pull weeds.
- The shirt won at the city championship game now crawls under the car for oil changes.
So what does this all mean? Heck, I don't know. Probably that I'm too immature to accept adulthood and choose to whine about it in this blog. Just be thankful I'm not bitching about my lower back.
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